Maintain your old Siemens Hipath system

Trick Or Treat - Is This Make-Believe Or The Real Thing?

"I'll call you this week". "Yes, I'd love to see you again". "I had a great time". "I'm not interested in dating anyone else". "I think I'm falling in love with you."

These are a few of the phrases passed between singles as they move through the stages of meeting and dating. At the time, they are uttered with what feels like true emotion and honesty. No wonder the person they are directed to is so confused when the call never comes, the person becomes unavailable, or it soon becomes evident that the speaker is dating or deeply involved with someone else. Can we ever believe what we see or hear? How can we be sure?

Dating is a process of getting to know someone. It begins with an attraction, which is formed by that first impression. Often, this first meeting occurs by chance at a social gathering, at work or in the course of one's daily life. More and more, it happens through a response to a personal ad and the emailing and phone calls that follow. Both in-person and email or voice contact give us a sense of the other individual- but this is only a brief snapshot of who they may be. It takes real time together to create a larger and clearer picture of this other person and their rightness or wrongness for us. During this time we assess for friendship, attraction, shared interests and values, and a willingness and ability on the part of both individuals to move forward in a relationship.

Given that this is a process, it has stages. A first date helps the couple to learn more. It is a fact-finding experience, which involves not only the information the other provides, but our feelings and reactions to it and to them as a potential partner. We show our best selves and attempt to make an appropriate connection with someone we find desirable. In the best scenario, everything clicks for both people and conversation is natural and easy. More often, there may be questions, doubts, and/or mixed feelings. Seeing each other again is often suggested by one or both people and is a good way to learn more about each other and resolve any questions. But the doubts and negative feelings go unstated in a desire to either give the other person a chance or to let them down easily. It's also an easy way out for someone who is uncomfortable with this level of emotional honesty.

So, how do we know what the other person is truly feeling? You have several options for getting this information.

* You take them at their word and wait to see if they follow through with what they have said they would do. Nothing speaks louder than behavior. This option is the most common choice and can leave you in that all too familiar holding and wondering pattern.

* You attempt to address the situation openly and candidly. This one requires a bit of courage and an ability to be vulnerable. State how you are feeling in a thoughtful but honest way. Ask them to do the same for you. Let them know that you want to hear their honest thoughts about how the date went and if they would like to get together again.

* The third option should be used regardless of what you do with the other two. Pay attention to their non-verbal communication. How do they look at you? What quiet responses do you get after you have shared something about yourself? What do you see in their facial reaction, posture and eyes? Do you FEEL interest or just politeness? Are they really WITH you, or somewhere else? If you learn to listen to the non-verbal language, you will HEAR much more than what their words have to say.

Listening to the whole person applies throughout the stages of dating and relationships. It is also important during this time to pay attention to their behavior and note inconsistencies or mixed messages. Too often people don't and are stunned when a relationship "suddenly" ends or they find out they are seeing someone who was not the person they thought they were. Trust your instincts and listen "with a third ear".

Remember also that the responsibility for honesty is also on you. Don't say what you think the other person wants to hear because you don't want to be impolite or hurt their feelings. If you really think about it, it is more hurtful and in poor taste to be dishonest with someone who has a true interest and is trying to learn yours.

Toni Coleman, MSW is a licensed psychotherapist and relationship coach with over 20 years of experience. As a recognized expert, Toni has been quoted in many local and national publications including: The Chicago Tribune and The Orlando Sentinel newspapers and Family Circle, Woman's Day, and Star magazines. She has been featured on ABC News; Discovery Health Channel and AOL Online. As a weekly contributing commentator on the KTRS Radio Morning Show, (St. Louis, MO), Toni offers dating tips and relationship advice in response to listener feedback. Toni founded Consum-mate.com in 2002 to offer singles the knowledge and tools they need to find and sustain healthy, lasting love relationships. She is a member of The International Coach Federation, and The International Association Of Coaches.

In The News:

Russian woman faces additional US govt charge
Tue, 17 Jul 2018 22:18:00 +0100
A Russian citizen is facing further charges after being accused of infiltrating political groups in America.

Mandela Day: Former president remembered
Wed, 18 Jul 2018 01:02:00 +0100
In death as in life Nelson Mandela is both celebrated and revered.

Trump: I mis-spoke over Russia election meddling
Tue, 17 Jul 2018 18:46:00 +0100
Donald Trump has backtracked on his claim that he "didn't see any reason" why Russia would be involved in US election meddling.

Hotel sues victims of Las Vegas massacre
Tue, 17 Jul 2018 17:42:00 +0100
The Las Vegas hotel where gunman Stephen Paddock opened fire on hundreds of festival-goers is suing the victims of the shooting.

British woman impaled by umbrella on windy US beach
Tue, 17 Jul 2018 09:33:00 +0100
A woman from London was impaled by a beach umbrella after it flew towards her due to strong winds on the US east coast, police have said.



tikatoshop.it

Erfahrungen mit Pallhuber Wein
Agen Bola SBOBET Terpercaya

Travel in comfort and at your leisure with CT Airlink Limousine & Car Service for top quality private transportation and exceptional customer service. We operate Sedans, SUVs & Vans for CT Car Services to covering all Connecticut airports including Car Service from CT to Newark Airport , Mohegan Casino Uncasville CT, Foxwoods Casino Mashantucket CT, Manhattan Cruise Terminal NYC, Brooklyn Cruise Terminal NYC and Bayonne Cruise Terminal NJ. CT Airlink hire licensed and friendly chauffeurs who have in-depth knowledge of the Areas.

How to Find the Background of Your Online Date

The popularity of online dating has increased dramatically over the... Read More

Meeting Women: Surefire Spots To Get Dates

The first thing I want to do immediately is to... Read More

10 Reasons to Use Online Dating Sites

There are many more reasons than just ten that I... Read More

Am I Weird If I Date Online?

True story: A few years back I was working with... Read More

Finding Fun Date Ideas

The three most usual choices for what to do on... Read More

Are You Up For The Challenge

Back in 2004, I met a gentleman who was interested... Read More

Instant Dating Strategies Anyone Can Use

Most of us walk around caught up in our own... Read More

Say My Name

Surely you remember that famous line from American Pie, when... Read More

A guide for being single in Mimasaka, Okayama Prefecture

"A Tsuyama singles scene?" scoffs single Mimasaka resident Hiroyiki Matsuda.... Read More

Online Dating - Needle in a Haystack?

No doubt about it, Internet dating has become a unique... Read More

How To Find A Dating Web Site That Is Right For You Today Starting From Scratch

So at last you're sick and tired of the bar... Read More

How To Find a Great Dating Partner and Have Fun Looking

Internet dating can be great fun for you. It is... Read More

When Should You Give Up on Chasing a Woman?

This week I want to discuss chasing women, or rather... Read More

Web Cams: Windows on the World

The webcam has brought a truly amazing variety of experience... Read More

First Date ? Tips for Women

You are on your way to your first date with... Read More

Filtering Values in the Dating Game

Ever noticed that when dating, no one really wants to... Read More

Russian Women - TOP 3 Reasons You Should Marry A Russian Woman

Do you know everything about Russian women that could help... Read More

How To Land The Catch Of Your Life Without Becoming Sharkbait

However you like to do it, dating is a dangerous... Read More

How To Approach Women

Now, let's start at the very beginning, what's the first... Read More

COMING SOON??Online Attractions

In my attempts to find the love of my life,... Read More

?Dating Again? Redefined

Define dating again as The Joy Of Dating Again. It... Read More

5 Mistakes Men Make On The First Date

The number one mistake made by men on the first... Read More

Free Online Chat! What Are The True Costs Of Free

As you're surfing the Internet and coming across titles claiming... Read More

Dating Tips: How to Get Yourself A Date

Well, if you didn't give that someone a bad impression... Read More

Use The Power of Focus When You Want To Get A Date

The Importance of FocusPeople are always looking for ways to... Read More